I love me some beer. My dad is a homebrewer, so I grew up in a household that appreciates beer and it’s many varieties. So needless to say, we’re serving beer at this wedding. Out of kegs. Made by my father’s bare hands. Oh hells yes. Our guests are going to get the treat of their beer-drinking lifetime with the batch my dad is making. So naturally, the bride and groom should consume their frothy beverages out of a goblet worthy of this occasion, am I right? Let’s think of our cup choices here. Back in college, we drank beer out of three things and three things only:
- the tap of a keg
- a can
- a beer bong
Now, I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say we won’t be doing any keg stands or beer bongs at the wedding…well, wait a minute, let me take that back - that’s not exactly true. Instead of a kiss, after Mike and I say “I do,” the wedding party will ceremoniously hoist us up over a bejeweled beer keg and place said tap in both our mouths, and when the beer hits our lips, we’ll know it’s official - that we’re husband and wife.
Ok, relax, I’m kidding. We’re not hosting a frat wedding. Yet.
But the fact still remains that we need to find the perfect pair of chalices to hold our beverages throughout the night - something that screams celebratory, but also makes us look like a couple of badasses. Both of us are German, so my mind immediately goes to BEER STEINS. I’ve never actually had the pleasure of owning a stein, so this occasion would make for an excellent excuse to do so. Here are a few that I’m digging:
Nothing like a busty wench to get the party started off right. No, not me. The lady on the stein. Sheesh!
Oooh! This one has bride on t he front.
To remind us of our trip to old Paris...
Dude. It's like art.
OR! We could get them customized…
Our last names are Hilgers and Hess - so I would want my mine to say this: “Fraulein Hilgers Von Hessinstein - BRIDE.” Actually, come to think of it, I wasn’t planning on changing my last name…but now that I’ve come up with “Hilgers Von Hessinstein,” I’m having second thoughts… Well, only if Mike changes his to that as well. Could you imagine the look on everyone’s faces if we were introduced as Mrs. and Mr. Hilgers Von Hessinstein? Hopefully they’d know we were joking…but Mike and I are *just* weird enough that they may even believe it. Hilarious.
Ok wait a sec here. I’m gonna step away from steins for a spell - but don’t worry, we’re gonna stay in the same family. What would you say to the bride and groom who drank their beers out of these:
Is this not the definition of 'rad'?
Bartender: How ’bout a beer for the lovely bride?
Britt (in manly man voice): I’ll have me a horns-worth, laddy!
Bartender: A horns-worth it is!
Everyone: Hazzah!
That’s my ‘drinking out of a horn’ fantasy. I know. Everyone has one of those, but I thought I’d share anyway.
Dude, I’m like really digging the set of horns. I would even drink my coffee out of those things. In a heartbeat. But if we do end up going with some stein action, we’ll end each toast with the word, “Prost!” It means “cheers” in German. I think that would be really rad-ass-ical.
Find all these bitchin’ steins here.
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