LA Times Offering FREE Wedding Announcements

I'm not a big fan of formal wedding announcements in print. They usually involve a contrived picture of the couple and an impersonal block of text. If this picture to our right had a caption it would read: "Hey look at us, we conquered heterosexual monogamy! And we think that's worthy enough to be announced in the LA Times!"

Annnnd cue fart sound.

The kicker is that these announcements cost A LOT of money. Like $300! I otherwise would have no desire to announce our wedding in the paper, but since the LA Times is giving it away for free...why not, right?

Well. If I do decide to do this, it will not be serious. I don't care if it's free, I couldn't picture myself wasting my time writing a serious wedding announcement. So just for fun, I decided to write a mock-up joke wedding announcement for Mike and I - complete with companion photo of course. Having the balls to send it to the LA Times is yet to be determined...

Hilgers/Hess

The parental units of the bride-elect, Ms. Britt Hilgers of Los Angeles, CA regretfully announce the impending marriage of their daughter to Mr. Mike Hess of Los Angeles, CA. Their bastardized version of a wedding will take place in a really sh-tty part of downtown complete with lovely views of an abandoned warehouse and a strip club across the street. The bride-elect and the bridegroom have lazily opted to have their catering done by a taco truck, make their guests take the city bus, and will not have a traditional wedding party, a traditional cake, a traditional processional or a bouquet toss that singles out "All the Single Ladies." Whether or not this is even a real wedding, is yet to be determined. The couple have decided to have the wedding (a.k.a. "The Colossal Mistake") take place on July 31, 2010 at BOXeight, a photography studio with naked ladies on the walls.

I personally think this would be an awesome keepsake. A fake wedding announcement in the LA Times?! I love it. Not sure I'm gonna roll with it, but I think it would be hilarious.

Anyway, if you want to take advantage of the LA Times' offer, visit here. They are offering straight up FREE announcements from now until Nov. 30th.

(source)