K-Ci & JoJo Songs: Only Acceptable if Used Ironically

Weddings are very much centered around music. We're no exception to this...hello, Bowie.

I'm a huge music fan, and I'm bored with hearing the same-old, on-the-nose love songs played at weddings. Sorry, K-Ci & JoJo. Sorry, Savage Garden. You guys were a hit at my High School dances, but a girl's gotta draw the line somewhere.

However, and this is a big HOWEVER, I would never suggest - or think it was right - that you base your first dance song - or any love song played at your wedding - on 'how cool the song makes you look.' If you want to play K-Ci & JoJo's R&B masterpiece "All My Life" or Foreigner's mind blowing passion anthem"I Wanna Know What Love Is" go for it! Just try mixing in a few new ones, eh? ;) Thasss all I'm sayin', yo.

We already know what our first dance song is. But, for those of you who need some suggestions, here are a few. And these totally are NOT limited to first dance songs. Love songs are used throughout the whole affair: processional, recessional, during cocktail hour, while guests wait for the ceremony to start, during dinner, during the dance party, and as a last song send-off. So if you're like me and using music for every single one of these, you may get a little help from the following list:

I italicized the most offbeat choices. So just go with it, man!

Magical Feeling Kinda Love Songs:
Magic in the Air - Badly Drawn Boy
May This Be Love - Jimi Hendrix
Lili, My One and Only - Smashing Pumpkins
Is This Love? - Bob Marley

February Stars - Foo Fighters

Maps - Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Miracle - Foo Fighters

Deep, Can't Live Without You Kinda Love Songs:
This Must Be The Place - Talking Heads

By Your Side - Sade

Crush - Smashing Pumpkins
Yellow (piano version) - Chris Martin of Coldplay
Sky Blue and Black - Jackson Browne
Pictures of You - The Cure
This Year's Love - David Gray

Motion Picture Soundtrack - Radiohead (acoustic version)

I Could Die for You - Red Hot Chili Peppers

The Rain Song - Led Zeppelin

That's the Way - Led Zeppelin

Fallen for You - Sheila Nichols
Soul Love - David Bowie
Heroes - David Bowie
The Air That I Breathe - The Hollies
Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me - Mel Carter
Do You Realize? - The Flaming Lips
Everlong (acoustic) - Foo Fighters

Quirky, Fun Kinda Love Songs
Us - Regina Spektor
In the Aeroplane Over the Sea - Neutral Milk Hotel
All I Want Is You - Barry Louis Polisar

Melt With You - Nouvelle Vague

Love is Strange - Mickey & Sylvia

El Scorcho - Weezer

Only in Dreams - Weezer

This Boy - The Beatles
The Man in Me - Bob Dylan
Can't Take My Eyes Off of You - Lauryn Hill

Sexin' on the Dance Floor, Kinda Love Songs
These Arms of Mine - Otis Redding

Stay - Maurice Williams and the Zodiacs
Can't Get Next You - Al Green

The Blowers Daughter - Damien Rice

Waterfall - Griffin House
Colorblind - The Counting Crows

I Want You - Kings of Leon

Throw Your Arms Around Me - Mark Seymour
Cry to Me - Solomon Burke
House of Cards - Radiohead
All I Need - Radiohead

I Want to Sex You Up - Color Me Badd (And yes, I'm serious)

Got any more to add to the list? Or how about this: Tell me your LEAST favorite love song played at weddings. That should be fun.

Here's the acoustic version of Coldplay's "Yellow." I think it would make a beautiful first dance song.

2 for 1: Wedding Party Lounge + Bomb-ass Photobooth Idea

So during the ceremony, the ole wedding party isn't going to stand on either side of Mike and I. Instead, we wanted them to sort of lounge off to the side like the hella-fly VIP's they are. Only this time, they don't have to pay for a heinous little invention called bottle service.

I've been racking my brain, trying to come up with ideas for how they can situate themselves onstage without looking like a group of a-holes who were told to just stand off to the side and look pretty. That's not what we want at all.

SO. I came up with this idea:

We will set up a vintage style couch, or bench, or a rustic looking love seat of some kind. Like so:

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It will be accompanied by vintage hat boxes, old metal birdcages, a phonograph - and anything we can find that would enhance this vintage/rustic outdoor lounge wonderland.

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I also want to find some old log seats to set around the "outdoor sofa." Some wedding party people will stand, some will sit. The people I have told this idea to have said, "Wait we get to sit down during the ceremony!? Sweet!" So that's a positive reaction to this crazy idea, right?

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And the best part about this idea is that after the ceremony, we can RE-USE the lounge for the photobooth. We'll add more decor, throw in a few props and there you have it! A perfect little vintage photobooth back drop.

Anyone ever see a wedding where the bridal party sat in a "lounge"? I'd love to hear any more ideas for where to place the wedding party if ya got em.

Sugar Dollin' It? More like Sugar BALLIN' It!

Two of my fave bride bloggers, A Cupcake Wedding and Dawn @ The Alternative Bride passed along "The Fabulous Sugar Doll Blog Award" to me! Thanks, Dawn! Thanks, Cups! And thanks for continuing to inspire me with your awesome blogs. Y'all rawk the casbah on SERIOUS full blast.

So this is what I'm supposed to do:

"Tell everyone 10 interesting facts about yourself & pass the award onto other bloggers."

I'll make 'em short and sweet, my little Bowie beauts.

1. When I was an actor, I was always cast as the 'bitch' or the 'villain'... Wicked Witch of the West, Evil Stepsister, Pepper in "Annie"... not sure how I'm supposed to feel about that...
2. I worked at Gracie Films for a time and got to drive James L. Brooks' Lexus. No, I didn't crash it. Yes, I was nervous as hell. And YES it was a sweet-ass ride.
3. I have been a SoCal resident for 4 years. Before that I lived in Arizona, San Francisco, Wisconsin, and Illinois.
4. I have a BA in English from Arizona State and an MFA in Screenwriting from Chapman University.
5. I want to play keyboards for Parliament Funkadelic. On tour. For one year and that's it. I'll also settle for back-up singer or 'a-hole who dances on stage in dreads and a diaper'.
6. I had a weird childhood obsession with Ace Ventura. As in, I fantasized about playing the role of Ace's daughter in the sequel. Thankfully my obsession had slightly waned during the time "When Nature Calls" came out. Otherwise, I don't know how I would have handled the let down...
7. The first role in a play I ever landed happened in 6th grade. I played the lead MALE character, named Johnny Appleseed. Hmmmph. So what if I had one of those short mushroom haircuts! That doesn't make me a boy!!! Or does it??? (sadly still trying to figure this one out, guys).
8. I feel it is my duty to educate people on marriage equality.
9. I have little to no spacial awareness. I trip and run into things ALL THE TIME and it drives me crazy - yet I keep running into things. Ugh.
10. This is where I wish I was RIGHT NOW: Rome. '89. Phil Collin's concert. Front row. Phil in a purple blazer. Me in Acid wash jeans and a neon crop top T-shirt that says "Take me Home". Beer in each hand and a glass of wine on deck. Hardcore jamming to 'Easy Lover' with the promise of gelato and a decent lay on the horizon. (This is a normal fantasy, right?)

I'm going to pass this award to the following peeps:

1. The Danger Zone with Kenny Bloggins - Not a wedding blog, but hands down one of the funniest chicks I've ever met. This is her tagline: I love the two Kenny's: Chesney and Loggins. Only check out her blog if you think you can handle it's extreme badass-ery. She also has another blog called Kenny Chesney Serious that is equally as genius.
2. A Los Angeles Love - I can't say enough good things about Becca. She has the most thoughtful approach to wedding planning ever. I love her style, her views on marriage and partnership, her devotion to being a green bride, her love of LA, and her thought-provoking analysis of tradition and how it applies to her and her partner's modern day nupts. Her posts truly inspire me everyday - which makes me a very lucky gal, because I get to meet her tomorrow!

Rehearsal Dinner Idea: B.Y.O.F....to a Bar!

I don't know why the EFF I didn't think of this before...but there are surprisingly a few bars and lounges in LA that DON'T serve food, but will let you B.Y.O.F. - that's Bring Your Own Food, baby! There is literally a bar in my neighborhood that allows this called Little Bar. The idea was staring me in the face and I had no idea!

SO, since our nupts will be downtown, I searched for a place that has this same policy on BYOF. And guess what, mofo's? Mama found one. It's called The Golden Gopher and it's RAD. Peeps have been telling me to try out this bar for a while, so it definitely has the cool factor working for it. We could order in like 6 pizzas and let everyone go nuts ordering drinks at the bar for like an hour or two. This way we'll still be able to have the rehearsal dinner in a rockin' location, only we won't have to go homeless trying to pay for it. Yay! Also, this way the rehearsal dinner will be informal with an emphasis on fun and getting jazzed for the wedding the next day. I want people to mix and mingle and meet each other as opposed to being confined to a dinner table, sitting next to people they already know.

A few more deets about the Golden Gopher from their website:

"The Golden Gopher is as comfortable as the corner tap, a luxe hangout that provides an ample selection of top-shelf liquor "to go”, thanks to its still valid 1905 liquor license, issued when Teddy Roosevelt was Commander-in-Chief. Adjacent skyscrapers can be seen from the bar’s striking indoor/outdoor smoking patio.

Situated in the heart of Downtown’s Historic Core, the Golden Gopher is within walking distance of South Park, the Arts, Jewelry, Financial, and Fashion Districts, and close to several major hotels."

Doesn't that sound divine!? Their liquor license from 1905 is still intact! So needless to say, in true R. Kelly fashion, we'll be purchasing a few bottles to go...you know, for the after party...and OF COURSE for the hotel lobby...

So, I hinted in my previous post that not being able to stay st The Standard may be a blessing in disguise...WELL, The Golden Gopher is within walking distance of these new hotels, whereas The Standard was a little too far.

And good news on the hotel front...We have a block of rooms reserved at The O Hotel! More to come on that later...

BCBG Offering $100 Off Purchases Over $300

Dudes. BCBG is the NAZZ. They have some fly-as-balls white dresses that could easily pass for a wedding dress, or a reception dress to dance in.

Head over there quick. The sale is only on through the weekend. Oh, and did I mention you get a FREE subscription to Vogue when you purchase online? Hells bells, bitches! Get shoppin'!




Aren't these HOT?

Shoes for the Sassified Bride...

New shoes from Vicky Secrets for the bride that wants her stems to stand out.

Efffff. The Standard Hotel is BOUGHT OUT.

My worst fears have been confirmed: The hotel we DESPERATELY wanted our guests (and us) to stay at for our wedding weekend, is completely bought out. Not the weekend before, or the weekend after, or for any other GD weekend in the next 9 months - JUST the weekend of July 31st.

W. T. F.??????

And if I hear that it's been bought out by Hollywood's newest underage-drinking socialite a-hole, I think I'll barf. (Whatever. I can criticize. I work in this effing business).

Since hearing this sad news, I've sucked it up, explored other options and found two RAD hotels that are even CLOSER to our venue. So, all is not lost. And I realize that this will be the first of many let-downs that will pop up in the next 9 months. So I'm glad we were hit with one now, so we can prepare for the disasters to come. So come on , disasters! Whatchu got!? Ok, no I'm kidding. Please stay far, far away.

So, wanna hear our other options? Oh you KNOW you do, son! Well. Two hotels, both located right by the Staples Center (awesome for out of town guests now that LA Live's various festivities are up and kickin'), both located on a public transportation train route that travels to our venue (EXTREMELY important - and it's a train, not a bus - perhaps less intimidating or confusing for out of towners), AND it's located within walking distance to some FAB restaurants and bars. The hotels are called Figueroa Hotel and The O Hotel.

1. Figueroa Hotel, or The Fig for short, is a Moroccan-themed wonderland filled with lush decor and some hella fly spots to snap pics at. SoCal Brides, they do weddings too, just FIY. I'm not sure what the rates are per night to stay here...they don't allow online booking, which is a tad weird for 2009, but whatevs. So I'll have to see what their group-rate sitch is like and go from there.


2. The O Hotel, aside from it's totally orgasmic name, boasts a very chic and modern urban loft kind of feel to it - very much like our venue. I was nervous it would be too pricey, but was thankfully ecstatic to discover it is only $109/night - and that's not even the group rate! SO! We can have our guests stay in a fly-as-ballz hotel for a cheap-as-nutz price. And that makes me feel happy-as-a-clam awesome.



And as a little teaser for my next post...I'll just say that this 'Standard Hotel being booked thing' may be a blessing in disguise...because I found a KILLER idea for the rehearsal dinner that will likely NOT break the bank. So smiles all around, dudes. I'm sad our guests won't get to experience the Standard's kitschy excellence. I mean, peek-a-boo showers, creepy dead hooker hallway, and a rooftop pool and bar? Yeah. Way rad. BUT I'm confident the O and the Fig will rock just as hard.

Alright. I want to open up this discussion a tad. What were some of your wedding planning let-downs (be them big or small)? And how did you deal with it?

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Midnight Dress Doubts, Pt. II of My Thrilling "Second Thoughts" Series.

CRAP. NARDS. BALLZ. EFFFFFFFFF.

Excuse my 'lame' case of Turret's, but dude. Having 2nd thoughts BLOWS. As I was desperately trying to fall asleep the other night, I couldn't stop thinking about my wedding dress situation. I had a minor freak-out that maybe the Watters wedding dress I bought a couple months ago isn't all that practical or entirely 'me'. Allow me to explain:

As I write this blog, I find that my 'bride style' is developing and evolving along the way. I should have KNOWN that maybe my 'bride style' now won't be the same as next July when I actually have to wear the damn thing. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE MY DRESS. It's sexy-fly and hugs the curvies nicely, so it's not too too traditional in that sense. BUT it's still a long, mermaid, ivory wedding dress that I paid nearly a $1000 for - and yeah sure, that's a good deal on a designer wedding dress... but let's get serious here. A thousand dollars is a sh-t ton of money for a dress I will wear only ONCE. I secretly wanted a short, fun, unique wedding dress all along - one that I found from a small-scale, independent designer. But then I thought I wouldn't feel 'bride-like' enough. Whatever that means (NOTE: I have since not given two sh-ts about feeling 'bride-like' on my wedding day). And PLUS, others kept telling me that I would regret not wearing a long dress...little did they know...

Well. Hmm.

I'm not saying I'm changing my mind about the Watters dress...YET. I'm having a second reception dress made by a very talented designer on Etsy. YAY FOR INDEPENDENT DESIGNERS! Here are some pics of what my custom dress is going to kind of look like (Think sweetheart neckline and a tulle overlay on the torso and bust):

Photos by Renee Brazel

This dress is SO fun and unique I can't even handle it. And I don't care what all the haters say, I LOVE tulle - maybe not in long ballgown form, but in short form, it's hella fly. Right now I'm paying under $300 for this custom dress. I ain't gonna lie. I'm having buyer's guilt for buying two dresses...granted they aren't the "thousands of dollars" kinds of dresses, but whatever, we need all the extra cash for this wedding we can get. And Plus, why would I want to hog TWO FULL DRESSES when I could sell an AMAZING designer dress to a fellow bride on a budget for half the price!? I'm ALL ABOUT spreading the love, so why the HELL do I have two wedding dresses? It just seems more practical for me to sell the Watters dress and just wear the short one the whole night. Again, love the long dress, but my other dilemma is this: I CAN'T DANCE IN THE WATTERS DRESS. My knees are like permanently buckled together in it. And I'm a TOTAL idiot for not really considering this fact in the first place - given the fact that I NEED to dance hardcore at my wedding.

So the question is:

1. Do I sell the Watters gown and wear the short one all night?
   
2. Or should I sell the Watters gown and put more money into the short dress (like $100 more for better tulle or cup inserts or boning or whatever).
   
3. OR should I just shut the eff up and keep both dresses?
   

Yeah, yeah I know. I'm the only one who can make this decision. And it's probably going to involve me trying on the dress over and over and staring at it long and hard. But damn. This is hard, yo.

...My other concern is this: Will I even be able to sell the Watters dress? I wonder how easy it is... Do you know anyone who would even want a Watters Size 10 mermaid, sweetheart neckline, strapless, ivory gown? If I actually do decide to sell this thing, I of course will post some pics of the actual dress. But until then, if you want to see the dress pics in the meantime, email me at bowiebride@gmail.com
Ugh. Need. Advice. Now. PLEASE share your second thoughts dress stories and how you remedied the situation. AND don't forget to spread the word about possibly selling my Watters dress. If I know I have someone at least interested, I'll be more gung ho on the idea of selling it...

Thank you!!

Far-out 'Fro-wear From VieModerne

I got some hella delish hair treats for you ballers to feast on right now. So strap on your Hammer pants and bust a move, cuz ya fro's about to get a funky fresh make-over.

An old friend of mine, Finland-based photog, Sarah of Little Ark Photography , told me to check out Etsy seller VieModerne's hair-wear posthaste. And boy am I glad I did. I've been on the search for a different kinda hair flower...something with a little edge but still super feminine and pretty, and I think I have found it! VieModerne takes your average peacock feather and makes it into a piece of hair art. Check these out, and let the hair lust begin!

1. Now here's a hair flower a hipster bride could get down with.

2. This one may be my fave. I'm really considering wearing it for the rehearsal...

3. The pattern on this one to die! A great way to go bold without going too crazy.


4. See what I mean about the peacock feather hair art?

5. More peacock hair art!

6. I love the overlay on this feather. The perfect touch for a wedding with pops of yellow.

7. And just to show you a sample of her other work (aside from hair-wear), here's a gorg flower ring she has for sale. I would totally give these to the ladies of the wedding party to wear on the big day. Just the perfect little touch of color. And it's re-wearable!


Click here to go nuts at VieModerne's Etsy shop!

The Bowie Bride Blog Manifesto. (Please Read! Real Solid Gold Shiz Inside!!)

The Bowie Bride Blog Manifesto

by

Britt Hilgers

I've been doing some reflecting as of late. About a lot of things. Particularly what writing this blog means to me. Because it's not just something that I do out of boredom or just for attention or what-have-you. Writing this blog has helped me to really put myself out there and truly examine what 'getting married' means to me and how it corresponds to my worldview. Weddings are huge expressions of who you are as individuals and as a couple. I'll be damned if I'm going to blindly follow outdated traditions without even examining why they exist in the first place. For me, weddings are about love, commitment, and celebration, and way less-so about flower arrangements and stressing over seating charts. Trying to blindly follow every single wedding tradition made me HATE weddings. I didn't even want to plan one. Until...

...I stumbled upon think-outside-the-box brides like The Broke-Ass-Bride and Rock 'n Roll Bride. These blogs, along with a slew of other fabulous wedding blogs, totally changed my attitude towards weddings. They taught me that DAMMIT, "it's our wedding, it's OUR commitment that's being made - not anyone else's - so why not be OURSELVES?" And let's face it. I'm not a follow-the-rules kinda person, so why would I be a follow-the-rules kinda bride? I guess I was just fearful. I was that little birdie who was too much of a pansy ass to spread her wings and fly. Ok. I know. Sorry for the lame metaphor. I agree with Jack Nicholson that, "Anyone who speaks in metaphor can shampoo my crotch." Which, as a side note, is among the greatest quotes in cinematic history. So as payment for speaking in said metaphor, please excuse me for a moment while I go shampoo Jack's junk.

*Turns on "The Glory of Love" from the Karate Kid, Part II*

*Proceeds to shampoo*

*Finishes with light rinse*

Ok. All clean!

ANYWAY. I want to continue writing this blog after the wedding, so I've been trying to hone in what this blog is about at the core, and why I think it's worth a read - for now AND for after we're married. This is what I have boiled my approach to weddings down to:

1. Humor. I try to have a humorous approach to writing. No? You don't think so? I just shampooed the Joker's Johnson! On a wedding blog! With No Apologies! If you don't think that's hardcore awesome, you have no business reading this here shiz. ...Ok. I'm kidding. You don't have to think I'm funny. I wouldn't laugh at me either. I don't take weddings (or life in general) too seriously. If I did I would hate planning these nupts. So every once in a while, all us brides need a chuckle. And sh-t, maybe that little chuckle can inspire an idea or give you a release from a stressful planning moment. See: Hipster Bride Style Guide, After the Party Comes the Hotel Lobby, and Ass Facial Honeymoon to see what I mean.
2. Courage. I want to be myself, even if 'myself' can sound harsh at times. See, the post Where I Stand to get an idea. My marriage to Mike is everything. It is the single most important commitment I will make in my life. And quite frankly, I don't want to eff with that. We want to be ourselves through and through on our wedding day with no regrets and most importantly, no fear. If we want to include a statement on marriage equality during the ceremony, we're not going to back down because we think 'some people won't appreciate it.' If they don't, they should wake the eff up. It's 2009. ...See? So harsh that Bowie Bride, she is. ;)
3. Practicality. With the humor and the honesty in my writing comes a defined sense of practicality. I can't justify wasteful wedding behavior like buying expensive china sets I'll never use or demanding our ceremony showcase an assload of out of season flowers from New Freaking Zealand - or even using real flowers at all at this point. I'd like to take a cue from fellow green brides and try to be as environmentally conscious as possible. I have a lot to learn. But hopefully this blog can be an open discussion and a decent start to adapting a greener perspective on weddings and everyday life for all involved. Check out part 1 and part 2 of my Post-modern Bride Guide to see what I mean.
   
4. A Little Bit of Crazy. My homegirl from A Cupcake Wedding described my blog as, "like spending time with your craziest, coolest friend." Which is an AMAZING compliment, btw (Thank you, Lady C!). Whenever I describe my wedding ideas to my more traditional friends, I always preface it with, "Okay, you're gonna think I'm nuts, but I have this rad idea..." But at the heart of all my crazy ideas, there's a genuine concept - sometimes it just takes a little creativity to find it. Check out these posts to see what I mean: All the Single Ladies...AND Single Lads, The Bride Took The Bus, and Inspiration from the Dogg Pound (of the Snoop Variety).
   

So that's it. Humor, Courage, Practicality. and a Little Bit-a-Crazy. I'm currently calling it "FAR OUT INSPIRATION FOR DOWN-TO-EARTH BRIDES." It's the start to a happy marriage, Bowie Bride stylee.

I hope you all have loved reading as much as I have enjoyed sharing. I can't plan this wedding without you guys. I mean that, yo. So let's keep the bride support alive!

Much Love--

Britt

P.S. The lovely lady in the corner is a picture of one of my heroes, Dorothy Thompson. I thought I'd share a very fitting quote of hers, one that keeps lil ol' me going day to day.

"Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live."

- Dorothy Thompson

Saks Sale - 25% OFF + FREE SHIPPING

Dudes. If you need a wedding dress, rehearsal dinner dress, reception dress, wedding party attire, e-pics outfit, a clutch, a groom's suit, or some fly-ass shoes, there are tons of designer options available at Saks online. I think the sale ends today, so hurry over there and receive 25% off + free shipping on nearly everything. Just enter the coupon codes FRIENDS2 and OCTSHIP9 at checkout to receive the discounts. Here's some wedding-y stuff I found: