Friday, September 3, 2010

I Promise My Honeymoon Recaps Will Not Bore You

I love wedding recaps. Not so much honeymoon recaps. Why? Because this is what they sound like: "Hey, look at us! We're in love and on the best vacation of our lives! We're tan and happy and getting massaged and pampered! Here's another kissy-face pic of us in paradise! Wish you were here! But you're not! Neeeener neeener poo poo!"

Faaaaaart.

Don't get me wrong. I am balls happy for the couple that has a fantastic honeymoon. And I promise I don't roll my eyes at their blissfully happy honeymoon posts.  I just avoid them all togther usually. Nothing personal.  Just not ma'bag.

I, on the other hand, did not have a fantastic honeymoon. So my recap posts will sound more like this: "GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS HOT HELL HOLE!" and "WHY, GAWD? WHYYYYYYYYYY?!?!"

Yeah. That's no exaggeration. It was that bad. Nothing bad went down between the husband and I, don't worry. It was the circumstances we were in that blew donkey balls and licked major monkey taint.

So look forward to that shit.  In the meantime, here's a teaser shot from our Shittymoon (that's what I'm referring to it as from here on out, BTW).
WORST. AIRLINE. EVER. Truly. It does not get worse than this, guys. Mexicana runs a shitshow of an airline and I can't wait to tell you aaaaaall about their incompetance. I am fuming just thinking about the diservice they did to us and to 70 other passengers who paid good money to fly with them.  They are liars. And they cheated us. And they are going to feel my fucking wrath.
Posted by Britt Hollenbrau at 8:28 AM
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8 comments:

  1. Ha, I actually bored myself writing my honeymoon recaps. Except for my awkward massage post. That was fun...and awkward.

    Sorry you had a Shittymoon. But hey, fantastic blogging material, right?

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  2. Uh oh...I'm interested to hear about what went wrong? We flew Mexicana about 2 years ago down to Los Cabos and didn't have any problems. Sorry your s-moon went down so horribly :(

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  3. (Eew, the thought of monkey taint licking. I just barfed. Thanks, Britt!)

    OK, yeah: I hate that your honeymoon sucked.

    However: I kinda love how you guys joyously gave it the thumbs-down. And I kinda love how you embraced the Shittymoon.

    Overall: I'm just glad you survived it. Bad trips can sometimes bring out the bad in people, particularly couples, but once again, this proves Bowie Bride & Bowie Groom are an entirely different breed. xoxo.

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  4. Oh dear. Looks like I won't ever be flying Mexicana Airlines.
    Looking forward to the shittymoon recaps in all their sucky glory.

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  5. I saw on the news that Mexicana filed for bankruptcy and shut down operations a week or so ago. They didn't even bother to inform their passengers. People found out through the news that their flights were cancelled. What a shitty move.

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  6. I'm sorry you had the honeymoon from hell. :P I AM curious about it, though, which is more than I can say about 95% of honeymoon recaps.

    "Wish you were here! But you're not! Neeeener neeener poo poo!"

    haha, so dead on.

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  7. Sorry you had such a bad time!

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