Maybe it's just me, but more times than not, when a bride or groom describes their wedding to me, (yes, me in particular) they preface it with, "Our wedding was more low key...." or "Our wedding will be more traditional..."
This has confused me for quite some time. Why do these couples feel the need to "preface" the description of their wedding? Is it because they think I hate all weddings that aren't "rock n roll" or "non-traditional" or "cracked out and crazy"? Or is it not just me, and couples are describing their wedding to everyone in these terms?
I thought more about this and discovered that I do the same exact thing when describing my wedding to other brides and grooms, but in reverse. I preface my wedding descriptions with phrases like, "Our wedding was a bit 'out there'..." or "We decided to do things 'differently'..." And I would make myself and Mike seem like we were very self aware of our craziness, to the point where I felt the need to "apologize" for said craziness. And why, you ask, would I do this? Because our wedding was starkly a non-traditional, no-rules kind of affair. And I didn't want more traditional brides and grooms to think I was nuts and/or hated and frowned upon anyone who was more traditional than I. Because contrary to the vibe you may have gotten while reading this blog, I in fact, am a lover of all weddings. Sure, you may think of me as the poster wife for non-traditional weddings and that I tend to gravitate towards the stranger side of the wedding aisle, but that in no way makes me a hater of weddings that don't take my same approach. I love all weddings because I love love. And I believe in love. No matter how you choose to express it.
So, GO. Go be you. Plan the wedding you want. And don't preface its description to anyone. Not even to your grandma. Don't let anyone or anything make you NOT proud of the wedding you are pouring your heart into planning. Otherwise we are merely perpetuating the notion that weddings have to be one way or the highway. And that shit needs to stop, yo.
Nicole Polk Photography