Take Your Partner to Work Day

For most of us, more than half our waking hours are spent apart from our partners. For 12 hours of the day, Mike and I are in separate cities, doing completely different things, and interacting with a totally different set of people.  Me, with 10 male, Hollywood television writers. And him, with 100 Special Ed middle school pre-teens. I spend my day with a bunch of rich people with houses in the hills and 3rd Generation Prius's.  Mike spends his day with children whose parent/guardian can barely afford to feed them.  Like I said, two completely different worlds.  Only his world makes my world look like I spend my days as the lead float in the Asshole Parade.  Well, thankfully he doesn't look at it that way.  He's happy to be married to a creative person, even if that means she has to endure a shallow, vanity-obsessed industry to do so.

Career is very important to both Mike and I as individuals.  So when we go to work, we go because we love it. And because we are working toward furthering "the dream."  Doing the stuff that makes us who we are. Putting the "shit" in giving a shit. How the proverbial bacon gets brought home... Yet, I don't know what a weekday for my future husband *feels* like. I talk at length about my job when I get home. But he tends to leave his work talk at work.  I tell him all the time that I want to hear more about the details of his day, but he isn't too eager to share.  His reasoning?  Well, a day in the life of Mike at work is an emotionally and physically draining one.  Imagine being a teacher and not being able to fully teach a lesson because you are dealing with defiant, sometimes violent behavior issues for more than half the class period. A kid slapped him in the face one day, for ball's sake. Could you imagine doing that to one of your teachers? I mean, seriously!  You wouldn't want to re-live a day like that when you got home from it either. And this I fully understand. And have understood ever since he started teaching 4.5 years ago. 

However, there has been a change in Mike's career life as of late.  A really positive one. One that could be big. Really big, in fact. One that could  potentially promote change in the Watts community overall. Something that Mike will want to come home and talk about everyday with excitement in his voice.  He and a fellow special ed teacher started a Skateboard Club on campus.  Skateboarding is something that ALL their students love and have in common.  However, there are many kids who can't skate because they don't have money for the equipment; or they don't have the support or encouragement from an adult, or a "coach"-like figure.  Most of Mike's students cannot physically play contact sports like football or wrestling. So they miss out on the benefit of team building associated with sports. And that's all the school has to offer right now. But skateboarding is right at his students' level of skill and physical ability.  AND there's way less aggression associated with skateboarding, as opposed to football and wrestling. Aggression is something that Mike's students need to work very hard to harness. So I say it's about damn time that we give these kids a place AT SCHOOL that empowers them and encourages them to excel in all areas of life. 'Cause when you find something that you love and that you are really good at, your confidence overall becomes stronger.  And that's exactly what these kids need.

Not only was the first meeting of Skateboard Club a great turnout, but there was excitement in the room - excitement that is too often missing in the classroom.  Mike is a skateboarder too, so he showed them a few skate videos, and talked about the plans for club, and the possibility to further Tony Hawk's project on building a skate park in Watts, right by the Watts Tower.  Currently, the Watts community does NOT want a skate park built. They think it will further gang activity in some way.  Well. Mike sees that as being a completely false prediction. When his kids are skating, they're not doing drugs, or selling drugs, or participating in gang related activity, or whathaveyou. They are doing something they LOVE. Something they feel confidence in doing. Skateboard Club has gained even more popularity since it's first inception.  Mike got a company to set-up and take-down a skate ramp every other day after school so the kids can have something to practice on. And the best part: it's FREE. AND this company is going to accept FULL liability should any of the kids get injured.

Emotionally, skate club has lifted these kids' spirits immensely. Made them feel like someone actually gives a shit about them as individuals and their passions outside of school - something that wasn't present before. And in turn, Mike's students have felt more comfortable asking him for tutoring after class, and some have even confronted him about personal problems they experience outside of school - like abuse, thoughts of suicide, etc.  Mike is so jazzed about this club and the potential it has, that he invited me to observe his classroom on Friday. To head down to Watts with him for a full day of classes and experience what it's like, see how the kids interact, and to see how I can help with skateboard club.  'Cause I skate too, yo!  And if the girls in his class see that another chick skates, then maybe they'll have the confidence to try too. AND I have Hollywood connections... meaning access to $$$$ and "important" people...like contacting Tony Hawk's agent about the Watts Skate Park... See! I can use my Asshole Parade of an industry to do good afterall!

So, this Friday, I'm heading to work with my partner, skateboard in hand, ready to absorb a day of his work life. And after class lets out, we're taking one of his students, Darrell, on a skateboard reward for excellent work in the classroom. Mike got permission from Darrell's Mother to take him skating down Venice Oceanfront Walk because he's been making vast improvements in class - work-wise AND behavior-wise. (His Mom was ECSTATIC to hear this news by the way...)  And to think Darrell was one of Mike's most defiant students... See?  The kids want to do well in class. And perhaps skateboard club is to thank for it.  I'm really looking forward to experiencing Mike's world outside the world we live in together. I bet I'll fall even more in love with him, watching him up there at the blackboard, chalk in hand, explaining how to reduce fractions... My little teacherboy, Mr. Hess... Awww...

Have you been to your partner's work? What did you learn from the experience?