Hey, Hipster Brides...

Can you handle the wolf?

via Modcloth

Hunky-Dory Hair-Wear for the Half-Assed Hipster Bride

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I've written A LOT about real hipsters, so I thought, why not give a shout out to all the poser hipster brides out there? I think they deserve some advice too. So here we go - it's the HALF-assed Hipster Bride Style Guide: Hair-wear Edition.

So where do all these half-assed hipsters shop, you ask? Urban Outfitters of course!!! The oh-so-expensive but oh-so-awesome Urban Outfitters lured me into their online shop yesterday. I was so powerless against their fashion-forward offerings, that I had to buy something - but don't worry - I was able to justify my purchase...well kind of...I bought THE raddest Bowie shirt I've ever seen and probably will ever see, so it was essential right? Being that I'm the BOWIE BRIDE???? Right? Right? A girl's gotta represent, yo! And yes, I realize that by shopping at Urban, I can in turn call myself a half-assed hipster. If I found an ORIGINAL Bowie shirt from the 70's at a thrift shop with Cheez Whiz stains on it from the 80's, THEN I could actually call myself a full-blown hipster...but alas, half-assing it will have to do for now. Oh well!

Anyway, on to the hair-wear! Urban is a perfect option for the bride who wants something pretty but showcases some edge.

Far-out 'Fro-wear From VieModerne

I got some hella delish hair treats for you ballers to feast on right now. So strap on your Hammer pants and bust a move, cuz ya fro's about to get a funky fresh make-over.

An old friend of mine, Finland-based photog, Sarah of Little Ark Photography , told me to check out Etsy seller VieModerne's hair-wear posthaste. And boy am I glad I did. I've been on the search for a different kinda hair flower...something with a little edge but still super feminine and pretty, and I think I have found it! VieModerne takes your average peacock feather and makes it into a piece of hair art. Check these out, and let the hair lust begin!

1. Now here's a hair flower a hipster bride could get down with.

2. This one may be my fave. I'm really considering wearing it for the rehearsal...

3. The pattern on this one to die! A great way to go bold without going too crazy.


4. See what I mean about the peacock feather hair art?

5. More peacock hair art!

6. I love the overlay on this feather. The perfect touch for a wedding with pops of yellow.

7. And just to show you a sample of her other work (aside from hair-wear), here's a gorg flower ring she has for sale. I would totally give these to the ladies of the wedding party to wear on the big day. Just the perfect little touch of color. And it's re-wearable!


Click here to go nuts at VieModerne's Etsy shop!

Hipster Bride Style Guide: Food

You're a hipster. You don't eat that 'crap' other people eat. You'd rather pick up a sixer of bronsons and a vegan quinoa burrito. Cuz quinoa is, afterall, waaaay hipper than effing rice. So you better bet your hipster ass you ain't servin' no punk ass plated meal at your wedding. So check out these alts:

1. Vegan buffet-it
You don't exactly know why you're a vegan, but whatever.

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2. Serve Jack-sh*t.
Don't give free food to people who can afford to eat. Tell them the food they would have dined on has been donated to a homeless shelter, and see if they scoff. They won't. Well, at least not to your face.

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3. Brown bag it
Tell your hipster friends to stop using their vintage Wonder Woman lunchbox as a purse. Instead, tell 'em to make their own damn sandwich and bring it to the wedding.

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4. Taco truck-it
Real hipsters eat tacos off a truck. In East-Los. Wait. We're using a taco truck for our wedding...does this mean I'm a hipster? NOOOOOOOO!

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5. Mickey Deeze it
There's that hipster irony again! And while you're at it, hire the Hamburgler to make an appearance. But watch out, he may steal your burgers!

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6. Raw Buffet-it
Eff cooking. You eat sushi 4 days a week anyway. Just don't serve California Rolls. (So not hip).

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Hipster Bride Style Guide: Centerpieces + Decor

The HBSG: Centerpieces and Decor

So you've got your dress, you've got the venue AND the accessories, now it's time to rock some serious indie-balls decor. I mean, if you're gonna get married in a bomb shelter, the least you could do is give the joint some personality. But you're a hipster, so fresh flowers and candles aren't really your bag. In fact, you're almost willing to NOT decorate the place out of protest. Luckily, the HBSG has your hook-up.

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1. Chandelier Made of Shades
Eff Crystals. You roll with retro eyewear. On your face AND above your head.

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2. Throw a few things together the day of.
Got a watermelon? Got some ugly fake flowers? BAM! Centerpiece magic.

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Cauliflower works too!

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3. I Fly Like Paper, Get High Like Planes.
You were down with M.I.A. waaaay before she hit the mainstream. Luckily, actual paper planes aren't considered "corporate"...yet.


4. Ah, irony.
It took hipsters nearly 10 years to be able to listen Britney Spears ironically. Must we wait that long for Miley Cyrus too?! NOOOOOOO!

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5. Unassuming Materials
If you're a real hipster, you probably already own one of these. (I actually have no real basis for that claim).

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6. LP Art
Don't even call yourself a hipster if you're wedding isn't going to showcase some vinyl (and I'm not talking about your fiance's collection of indie bowler hats).

How 'bout this for an aisle runner? (I may need to steal this idea...)

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Hipster photobooth props:

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Bomb-ass Guest Book

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7. Make Your Guests Do the Work For You!
Set up an ART WALL and let everyone create the decor for you. Throw a bunch of markers, pens, paint brushes, etc. in a centerpiece like so:

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Then create the wall by hanging up a large piece of butcher paper or a sheet. If you're not down with dancing, this could be a great alternative idea to keep your guests entertained.

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8. Recycled Art Altar
You already found your wedding dress at the junkyard, why stop there?

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Hipster Bride Style Guide: Accessories

I want to dress like a hipster. Just for a week. You know, just to see how it feels to be a true subversive 'badass'. I went to a hipster party in Silverlake (shocker) a couple weekends ago. Granted, this wasn't a real hipster party with actual living, breathing hipsters (tear...). It was a poser hipster party - meaning it was hispter themed. I NEVER pass up an opportunity to dress up like a jackass. So I went all out. And I must say, it felt strangely awesome. Look how HIP we look:

While at the party, I noticed that ACCESSORIES were what made everyone's hipster garb unique. Me: lion suspenders. Marisa: fannypack and a shirt that says, "Big Gulps." Kate: A giant fake tattoo right on her boobs. Brad: tight purple pants and a pencil thin mustache. So of course I had to do an HBSG Accessories post! So here goes. Let's get hip, mutha-uckas.

THE HBSG: Accessories

You're a hipster. The only jewelry you own consists of neon slap bracelets and safety pins that hold your underwear together. So you can bet your hip ass that you won't be caught dead wearing your mother's pearls on the big day. You roll your own damn way.

Let's start with the veil. Sure, the hipster bride may scoff at the whole idea of a veil in the first place... But let's examine the possibilities.

1. The Face Veil: not just for gypsy brides and female characters from Aladdin. And let's face it, how else would you be able to rock your faux hawk with a traditional veil?

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2. This veil gets the award for "hippest bird's nest ever worn on someone's head." That's a really competitive category by the way...

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3. Let's face it. The only person in the world who would rock a full-on camo veil would be you. Cuz you're just. that. hip. All you need is a bouquet of grenades and a Saigon hooker bridesmaid.

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And WHERE THE HELL will you put your pack of Parliaments during the ceremony? Well, how about carrying them right on your ASS? A Sequin Kitty Cat Fanny Pack is waaaaay hipper that a regular old sequin fanny pack. But you're a hipster, so you already knew that.

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Yeah, yeah, you caved and got an off-white wedding dress. Whatever. That doesn't make you a traditional bride. Not one bit. All you need is a pair of slinky space-like spandex leggings to go underneath. Get married, then get physical - Olivia Newton-John Stylee.

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And what would a hipster be without a little irony? A loser. That's what. So make sure you wear this:

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Oh, and one more thing, Hipster Brides, you can smoke all the Parliaments you want on your wedding day, just long as you smoke 'em out of one of these:

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